Pema Chodron on Tonglen

Once my clients accept that grief, fear, loneliness, and vulnerability are natural and essential feelings inherent to transitions, they often ask, “How can I be with these feelings?” It’s the right question: how to be with difficult feelings instead of trying to avoid, distract or protect against them through staying busy or projecting them onto others. There are several ways to be with feelings. I always encourage my clients to journal. Crying is good. Talking helps when it’s with the right person who won’t try to talk you out of the feelings.

But one of the most effective practices I’ve found to process the strong feelings that arise during transitions is the Buddhist practice of Tonglen. The in-the-moment practice is very simple: breathe is what we normally think of as “not wanted” and breathe out what’s wanted or, as the Buddhist nun Pema Chodron says on her site, “When you … Click here to continue reading...

Conscious Transitions TV: “Are you 100% sure?”

This is one the top questions that creates anxiety for my engaged clients, but it can really affect anyone in transition on the precipice of a major life decision. It’s simply unrealistic to believe that you’ll feel 100% sure about anything in life, and this video explains the reasons why.

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The Oprah Clips

From my first Oprah appearance in October 2003

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Conscious Transitions TV with Sheryl Paul: Waiting

In this week’s video blog, I read a short poem about the liminal second stage of transition called “Waiting.”

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Conscious Transitions TV: Be Careful Who You Talk To

In this week’s video blog, I explore how important it is to protect your internal space during the vulnerability of transitions.

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