Counseling

Short-term transition counseling and ongoing counseling available by phone or Skype worldwide. It’s my deepest passion to help you transform your anxiety into serenity and your depression into joy! Contact me today to learn more about my effective counseling sessions.

Most people find me because they’re experiencing intense anxiety around normal life transitions. But they quickly learn that the anxiety is an opportunity into a profound level of healing that they never knew possible. In other words, engagement anxiety actually has little to do with one’s partner but is an opportunity to heal deep-seated false beliefs about love, marriage, and self-worth. As such, my counseling practice has grown over the last fourteen years from a specific focus on engaged women to a wide lens approach to helping people transform their anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, loneliness, and lack of fulfillment to serenity, aliveness, and joy.

To read more about my counseling work for the WEDDING TRANSITION, click here.

To read about my counseling work for the MOTHERHOOD TRANSITION, click here.

Watch Sheryl conducting a session with an engaged woman on NBC’s Starting Over:

Transitions are doorways to healing. While many of my clients begin counseling with me during their transition (getting married, becoming a parent, moving, job/career change, retirement, loss of a loved one), when we shine the light of consciousness on the presenting questions, the underlying issues immediately surface. So what begins as, “How do I know I’m making the right choice by marrying my fiance?” evolves into an awareness of a lifelong struggle with self-doubt and the voices of anxiety that can erode an authentic sense of self-worth. Or the new mother who finds herself incessantly criticizing her partner realizes that her habitual negative focus needs to shift into a practice of increasing tolerance and acceptance.

Imagine that when you’re in transition you’re holding up a sieve to your psyche: the healthy, clear water easily flows through and what remains in the sieve are nuggets of your core issues, shining in the sun. You can view these issues as irritations and try to ignore them, or you can learn the tools you need to begin to heal them. The core issues typically center around the following areas:

  • Self-doubt
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Intolerance
  • Perfectionism
  • Need to control
  • If I’m not my (work, mother, success) identity, who am I?
  • Childhood issues

I rely on many tools in both my short-term transition work and my ongoing counseling practice. At the core of my work is a profound respect for the mysteries of the human psyche and the struggles inherent to life. My expertise in the field of transitions informs the work, as does my training in Jungian psychology and a highly effective six-step process called Inner Bonding®, created by Dr. Erika Chopich and Dr. Margaret Paul, through which you will learn to identify your intention, your false beliefs that are creating your anxiety and/or depression, and clear tools to help you heal and find the joy and clarity you seek.

For more information and pricing, email me directly at sheryl@consciousweddings.com.

To pay for counseling sessions, click below:

 

To pay for the telephone support group, click below:

 

Laurie - April 16, 2011 - 3:16 pm

Hi Sheryl,
I am going through a very rough time right now with anxiety and depression. I have been with my boyfriend for two years and lived with him for one. The past five years in general have been very difficult as I’ve watched my mother suffer through chronic illness and my grandma die of Lou Gehrig’s disease last summer. I want to get married for many reasons. I love him and want a family with him. I want my mom to be able to be at my wedding (I’m scared that she may die if it’s put off for years). I want to know that he is committed to me and that I’m not giving him everything without that promise. I know for many people in today’s society marriage doesn’t mean anything. But for me–it has always meant everything. I don’t care about a fancy wedding. I just want to feel secure in my bond. The problem is–he says he wants to marry me but doesn’t see why it has to be in the near future. This hurts me to my core and as a result makes me act angrily towards him. It’s so messed up that the root of me wanting marriage is love–but that my pain makes me act anything but loving and pushes him away. Can you please provide some insight? I don’t know how much longer I can go on feeling this way. I want the respect of being a wife, not a girlfriend.

Kristin - April 30, 2011 - 5:59 am

I’ve been wanting to write to you for awhile. Everything I’ve read that acknowledges the transition of a bride (the tough stuff) is usually about her identity in becoming a wife (in regard to having the husband). Well, my case seems so unique… I can’t seem to even look it up on the internet.

My fiance and I became engaged in December 2010. Right away, I thought I had to ask a bridal party (he had asked his “Best Men” BEFORE he had even proposed to me. Well, I asked 5 girls right away: 3 friends and my cousin… and one of my friend’s daughters to be the flower girl (later to ask his sister). They became distant, unreachable, yet controlling behind the scenes immediately to the point where anxiety over their control had me sleepless, losing weight, and sick. I didn’t realize I was getting sick over them at first. I thought I was just depressed which led me to looking up depression during engagement on the internet which led me to your book. The two girls I had asked to be my MOH’s became BEST FRIENDS (to the point where they even had the same birthday), hanging out with each other often on their own, the friend who I asked to be a bridesmaid was sending me e-mails telling me that they weren’t really my friends but that she was my “real and true” friend… only to find out, weeks later, that when I was trying to discuss this with them that that girl, too, was jealous she wasn’t the MOH and talking angrily about me.

I cut off ties with the three of them. I then felt because there was so much “drama” that I don’t want to discuss it with anyone. I just wanted it to end but the sequence of unexpected events just wracked my mind. It’s much better now that they’re gone… but it was a big eye opener… what the HECK was that?!?! I now realize I have to be very selective in my choice of friends in our marriage. Perhaps that was the lesson… but wow… life has a way of throwing some curveballs!

Benefits of what happened: I can help other young girls with my unique situation (though I really would love to hear from others who can relate), my relationship with my mom mended (she was locationally and emotionally distant), I’m more aware and discerning of character/who to let “close”

Negative: I don’t think they knew how I felt or that they understand what they did… I received no apologies… I’m also having a challenging time separating the situation from being a big “event” I will remember as part of the engagement period… it’s like I was finally happy and they wanted to take my happiness… a little jaded. My fiance also doesn’t fully understand what happened.

Do you know others who have LOST friends during this time?

Sheryl Paul - April 30, 2011 - 8:03 pm

It’s actually quite common to lose friends during a wedding – or any – transition. Transitions are times when we weed out aspects of ourselves and our friendships that are no longer serving us. It’s another area of grief that needs to be acknowledged and expressed. And it’s usually a signal that it’s time to find new friendships that reflect your current stage of growth.

Sheryl Paul - May 1, 2011 - 8:21 pm

It sounds like a very painful situation, and I’m guessing that there are deeper underpinnings at play in your dynamic with your boyfriend. Please email me directly using the contact form above so we can talk about this further.

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