The Rapture of Love

We long for rapture. We long to be transported to an otherworldly place where the problems that weigh heavily into our souls and the pain that pierces our hearts lift away, if only for a moment. We long to feel profoundly alive and deeply fulfilled. We long for ecstasy.

Western culture conditions us from the time we’re old enough to absorb information that the rapture and ecstasy we long for can be found in romantic love. If you find the “right” person, you will be airlifted out of the human realm and set atop a sea of clouds where life is beautiful and serene. If you find “the One”,  you will ride off into the sunset and experience unparalleled bliss from first kiss to last breath. Some part of our minds know that this is a fantasy, that there isn’t one person who has the capacity to offer a lifetime … Click here to continue reading...

Love is a Skill

One of my Conscious Weddings E-Course members sent me a beautiful article about real love. It was written by a Buddhist nun named Ayya Khema, author of “Being Nobody, Going Nowhere”, and is full of nuggets and gems about the true nature of the heart and what we believe about loving. As she wrote: “If we were aware that we all contain love within us, and that we can foster and develop it, we would certainly give that far more attention than we do. In all developed societies there are institutions to foster the expansion of the mind, from the age of three until death. But we don’t have any institutions to develop the heart, so we have to do it ourselves…. “If we see quite clearly that love is a quality that we all have, then we can start developing that ability. Any skill that we have, we have… Click here to continue reading...

When Love is Longing

Hollywood has done a number on all of us. From the time we’re old enough to ingest information, we’re inundated with images and messages about love, romance, and marriage that are shrouded in a shimmery cloud of fantasy. There’s nothing wrong with fantasy; the problems arise when fantasy and reality become blurred and we unconsciously absorb the unrealistic messages of, “You can have it all” and “Your Perfect Partner is waiting for you around the next corner” and “When you meet The One, you’ll ‘just know'”. We watch film after film and read novel after romantic novel that reinforce these damaging messages and then we wonder why our culture is so dysfunctional when it comes to love.

Much of Hollywood films are predicated on the theme that the story ends when the relationship begins. This means that for ninety minutes we’re hooked on characters who are chasing after each other, … Click here to continue reading...