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Why “Sex” and “Intimacy” are So Much More Than We Think
On the last round of Sacred Sexuality, we had a Zoom call that dropped us into a space of such tenderness and vulnerability that there were many tears coming from the Zoom squares. This happens sometimes, especially around the topic of sexuality. It's what happens...
The 3 Top Emotions Trapped Inside Every Intrusive Thought
Continuing from last week's post where I talked about the most important part of working with intrusive thoughts is to separate the content from the underneath layers that need attention, I wanted to give some direction about what the three most common emotions are...
This Might be the Most Important Aspect of Healing from Intrusive Thoughts
An intrusive or unwanted thought arrives... What if I don't love my partner enough? What if I'm a different sexual orientation than I thought I was? What if I'm trapped here forever? What if the world ends? What if I don't love my baby? What if I hurt a child? ... and...
During Dark Times, These are the Lights that can Guide us Through
There are different kinds of darkness. Sometimes we head out into darkness to go on a journey—there might be fear or nervousness, but also excitement and curiosity. What glittering stars might guide our way? What might we see once our eyes adjust? Then there is the...
There is Only One Way Through Fear, and I Had to Find it Last Week
Ever since our son, Everest, earned his private pilot's power-plane license a few months ago I've been wanting to fly with him. Maybe "wanting" isn't quite the right word; it's more like I've been wanting to want to fly with him because I wanted to support him and I...
Wise Women Know About Another Way to Live. Are You Ready to Listen?
What follows is the transcription of the first part of this week's Gathering Gold episode called "There is Another Way." To listen to the full episode, click here, or listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. As always, I value your comments and refections. *** I’m here on...
How was Nighttime Anxiety Met When you Were a Child?
Note: I wrote this post when Everest was nine years old. He's now eighteen. Of course, we're long past the time when we would stay with him while he fell asleep at night, but I'm happy to share that we still value connected time before bed. And I'm also happy to...
One Element of Self Trust Hinges on Letting Go of What Other People Think
I had planned to share about something else this week for the podcast. I was going to tell a story about a moment in a corn maze with our family, Victoria, and her boyfriend when we were in New Jersey a few weeks ago. As you can hear in the video below (click on the...
The One Thing that Remains When the Leaves Fall and the Children Grow Up
Note: I posted this on Instagram last week, but as I know that many of you are not on that platform, I wanted to share it here as well. Highly sensitive people are highly attuned to the passage of time. This can show up as:...
When Things are Groundless, Trust is the Ground Beneath Your Soul
When I was a kid growing up in the 70s, there wasn't much that we worried about on the global scale. Yes, there was the threat of nuclear war (which we protested on the streets of Los Angeles), but, ignorant about the effects of human consumption and greed, we did...
It’s Time to Quiet Self-Doubt and Step into your True Worth
Many years ago, when my boys were learning how to write, they would freeze in their tracks for fear of making a spelling mistake. Their perfectionist tendencies were not a surprise to us - after all, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree - and it was both...
These 10 Micro-transitions can Trigger Anxiety for Highly Sensitive People
Highly sensitive people feel every moment of life: the joys, the sorrows, the in-between times, the beginnings, the endings, the far-off music in the distance, the emotional temperature in a room. This is a gift, but it’s often experienced as a burden because we’re...
Mary Oliver Says You Do Not Have to be Good… But Do You?
"You do not have to be good." What does this line from Mary Oliver's poem evoke for you? When Victoria and I brought it into our last Patreon Zoom gathering, it led us into a rich and multi-textured discussion about goodness and perfection, which we then explore more...
The Top 4 Shaming Statements Highly Sensitive People Often Hear
One of the greatest challenges of being a highly sensitive person is NOT the sensitivity itself (which is a gift) but in how your sensitivity was responded to growing up - and even now, as an adult. As I've listened to the stories of my highly sensitive clients and...
Why the Time is Now to Commit to Your Inner Work
Highly sensitive people wrestle with deep questions from a very early age. We think about death, often to the point of anguish (see this week's Gathering Gold episode on The Fear of Death). We think about relationships and worry about the people that we love. We think...
Why Highly Sensitive People are More Prone to the Burden and Gift of Shame
Following up on my post from a few weeks ago where I talked about how intrusive thoughts both originate from shame and cause shame, I'd like to explore some of the root causes of shame. As I wrote about in the post: Intrusive thoughts also arise from shame as attempts...
This is the #1 Reason Why People are Terrified to Turn Inward
As much as you want to change and heal, as much as you long to feel more fullness, aliveness, calm, and well-being, as much as you deeply desire a way to navigate life with more ease and less attachment to control, as much as you ache to break free from your intrusive...
Breaking Free from Anxiety Hinges on this One Teachable Skill
One of the misconceptions about the journey of mental health is that once you "heal" (as if healing is a linear process and a final destination; it's not), you'll never feel uncomfortable symptoms again. This isn't the case. No matter how healed you are, you'll still...
This is How we Walked Through the Grief and Joy of Everest Turning 18
Many of you have been following me for years, which means you've essentially watched my children grow up. I started this blog when our oldest son, Everest, was five and half years old and Asher was just a newborn. They're now 18 and 13. I've written about their fears...
Our Fast-Paced Culture is Leaving Us Breathless but There is a Remedy
It's the theme of the week, the month, the year, these past two years. It's one of the messages embedded in covid. We're moving too fast. We can't catch our breath. We can't drop into our bodies. We can't find center. Everyone I talk to says the same thing, "I'm so...