The mother wound is rampant in our world. I know very few women who don’t suffer from some aspect of a it, which I define as:
A rupture of attunement where a mother, due to her own unmet needs, lack of fulfillment/sense of self, and/or narcissistic and judgmental tendencies is unable to meet the emotional needs of her child. The mother’s expectations and needs become paramount and the daughter learns to orient around those needs.
This isn’t about hating mothers or blaming for mothers for all our pain. The bottom line is that our parents will always fail us in some way; it’s the nature of being human. Just like there’s no such thing as a perfect partner or friend, there’s also no such thing as a perfect parent.
But we must name and see our wounds clearly so that we can heal them. And healing the mother wound is one of the most empowering and liberating journeys we can take for when we name the wound and allow our mothers to be fallible and human we can examine the old contracts, write new ones, and set ourselves on a trajectory that allows us to chart our own path, regrow self-trust, step into intrinsic worthiness and the fullness of our light, and receive nourishment from other sources of mothering.
We know we carry this wound, yet when it comes time to heal it, we may balk. Many adult daughters feel guilty even at the thought of taking a course like this because they feel like they’re betraying their mother in some way because they feel bound by an unwritten loyalty contract.
I’m sharing a clip from the Welcome Video from my course, Healing the Mother Wound: A 40-day course for daughters, to bring some comfort and reassurance to the part of you that might be intrigued by this course but feels scared to dip your toes into these waters. The part that carries a long line of daughter-guilt, always worried about offending your mother – and worries that somehow she might even know that you’re taking this course (she won’t!). The part that longs to receive a roadmap that will help you heal the wound so that you can find your true freedom and so that you don’t pass the wound on to your daughter.
The beauty of this wound is that it can be healed. And, as I share in this clip, when we find the courage to heal we do so not only for ourselves but also for the generations that come after us and the ones that came before us. We are not violating our mothers or grandmothers when we do this work. On the contrary, in some mysterious way, we’re honoring them, for our healing is also their healing.
Healing the Mother Wound is my newest course and, from the feedback I’ve received from the beautiful daughters who have taken it, offers tremendous opportunities for transformation. As Regina from Germany shared after the first round (her full testimonial can be found here):
“I have long had an inkling that my personal evolution lives in the age-old saying “ when the student is ready, the teacher will appear” . Upon discovering and experiencing Sheryl’s gifts and her most profound work, I can confirm that this is true. And what a teacher (spiritual midwife/mother/friend/guide/sister) Sheryl is! Every course of hers has come at an ideal time when a piece of my inner world was ripe and ready for the wisdom, space, expansion and ultimately return to my essence that these courses impart and facilitate.
“The Healing The Mother Wound course came down from the heavens at a time when I was at a true loss of how to relate to my mother in a more healthy manner. My inner relationship to her was pained, enraged, helpless, fraught and frozen in inertia. This course helped me gently enter this fragile landscape, with great care and guidance. Each of the 40 emails, every video, all of the MP3s, the beautiful group calls and the consciously led forum in community with other daughters gifted me an opportunity. Many opportunities in fact to starkly look at my past, hold the pain, behold the beauty, realize I have always been mothered and guided by forces greater than the mother who gave birth to me.
“With this course I found comfort and new tools to mother myself while healing deep, wild and untended wounds. I am learning to accept mothering from other sources. Most importantly for me I found the path towards courage to transform how I relate to my own mother. A month after the course ended I can say that our relationship feels lighter to me and I have ways to work with feelings of anger and guilt. I have regained the hope and confidence that my mother and I heal our relationship from the inside out.”
The next live round of this course will start on Saturday May 6th, 2023, and I very much look forward to meeting you there.
Group Coaching Calls:
I took this course last time and I loved it Sheryl. It’s beautiful to read this post today and see how much growth has happened in my life and my relationship with my mother. You’re right that healing the mother wound heals also the relationship with my mother, leading to greater freedom, acceptance, and joy around her. It’s like I finally learned that I don’t need her to understand me anymore and in a way I now understand her better. It’s a journey with ups and downs but it’s beautiful that healing is possible, that there can be more space and freedom. I hope a lot of daughters take this course! Thank you for being such a kind, compassionate, and understanding mother for all of us and ho have found our way to your work.
This is truly so beautiful and heart-warming to read, Kristina. Thank you very much for sharing it here! Sending much love ❤️
Sheryl, will this course be offered again in 2023?
Unfortunately no. I only offer this course once a year.
Say no more; I’m in! See you on Zoom 🙂
I hope so much that this course will be in French one day or with subtitles ..
So interesting subject