I’m very excited to be starting a video blog alongside the written one. This first series of videos will address my engaged and newlywed audience. I hope it provides comforting information for you.
[wpvideo HcXuDjRu]
Videos for the Anxiously Engaged – "You're Not Alone"
by Sheryl Lisa Paul | Mar 29, 2010 | Videos, Wedding/marriage transition | 9 comments
Thanks, Sheryl! This video was what I needed to help get me through the day. I’ve been having a rough couple of weeks and am blaming my anxiety and depression on my partner and my relationship. I’m getting married in 5 months and cannot stop thinking about how I want out…but I think it’s my fear telling me to run. Knowing I’m not alone is so helpful, and I really have to let myself believe that because I still buy into the notion that all should be joyous during this time. I’m looking forward to your other videos. Thanks again!
I’m so glad this was helpful. Yes, so often it’s the fear that tells engaged people to run. The challenge is always learning to distinguish between fear and truth – which always comes down to honing the practice of self-trust.
Yes, and that’s what I struggle with most, distinguishing fear vs. self-trust. I sent you a private email, and am hoping to work with you to learn how to trust myself. I cannot get married feeling this way, but don’t know if it’s something bigger or if it’s my fear trying to keep me protected.
Hi Sheryl,
Thank you so much. Im in tears. I can relate. I have the best man, in fact, we were engaged 9 years ago and I left because I felt I had things yet to do. I did those things and then he came back…we tried again but this time he broke it off because he didnt think he could live with the things I still long to to(and will always long to do)…. He is back,9 years later…we cant resist eachother. He wants to marry me today! I am and have always wanted him, I do love him, he is amazing but this nagging knot in my stomach holds me back and I know its my own fear. There is absolutly no reason I should be anxious. I think its like you said, feeling like it should be a joyous occasion and that I should have no doubts, being 100% confident. I just cant go down the aisle w/this knot. and yes, Im more concerned about the anxiety which causes more anxiety…Im just over here nodding my head at everything your saying…I just want confidence and peace!
thanks again. Ill read on….
Ginger
Thank you for sharing, Ginger. I have a lot of articles on my website, http://www.consciousweddings.com, that you might find helpful. And stay tuned for next week’s video blog which addresses how to manage that nagging fear.
Sheryl, we worked together briefly by phone after I perused the Conscious Wedding Planner. The vocabulary on describing the rite of passage that marriage is spoke my language. I went through all the things that you spoke about in your first video. Thank you so much for sharing. I, too, had doubts, fears and that knot in my stomache and I was forced to look at what I was so afraid of. My wedding turned out to be a beautiful experience and that was made very special by my conscious awareness of what I was doing as a choice. Working through, and still working through my fears and insecurities also offers an opportunity for growth and healing. Even though the first 2 years of marriage was tough and involved us leaving Los Angeles, leaving our jobs, staring new jobs, adjusting to a whole new city and now buying a house, the journey was been so deep, rewarding and I have grown to know my husband so much more than ever before. We are looking forward to getting pregnant soon, and this transitions we have gone through together will better inform us on what to expect. Thank you Sheryl, for sharing your wisdom, insight and caring for women going through this lifechanging journey.
It’s wonderful to hear from you, Jennifer! And thank you for sharing your story. I know that it’s women like you who made it through the wedding transition with consciousness and joy that offer immense hope and inspiration to those that are struggling through their engagement anxiety. I look forward to hearing more from you.
Sheryl,
I just wanted to say that I have started reading your blog at the very beginning…from the very first article in March 2010….and am working my way through the present. I am not currently engaged, or even in a relationship…but I know that these relationship anxieties and fears and being unaware of the deep fear that comes with relationship transitions…are the reasons why my latest relationship has ended up where it has (we are friends still…but not together anymore). This information is amazing…and I just keep seeing myself in it over and over and over.
This is a Godsend and the work you’re doing is amazing.
Thank you for doing it.
Niloofar
Thank you, Niloofar. I’m so glad it’s been helpful.