Among the many things that have been stolen from us as women, our pleasure and desire are perhaps two of the most harmful. Pleasure is our birthright. Desire is the pulse that links us to every living thing on the planet, and possibly the universe. When we’re disconnected from pleasure and desire, we lose access to our fire, our creative impulses, and our love of life.
Why has this been stolen from women? Why have we been brainwashed to believe that our bodies are shameful and our sexuality is sinful? Because men could see that our sexuality was intimately linked to our spirituality, and that it’s how we make worlds rumble and shake. They could see the power of our fire and they felt threatened by it, so they devised systems and theologies to convince us that were born in shame and sin.
We are not born in sin. We are born in beautiful connection to the miracles of our bodies.
We are not born in shame. We are born in love with the natural beauty of our bodies and their ability to bring delight.
Another way that the patriarchy had co-opted female sexuality is by convincing us that we can only allow our desire to unleash when we’re with a partner – and according to many theologies, that partner must be a man. Either way, this damaging and constrictive belief creates a system of ownership that leads women to believe that their sexuality is only valuable in relation to someone else.
Contrary to everything you’ve been conditioned to believe throughout centuries of brainwashing, you and you alone are the keeper of the flame of your pleasure and desire. You do not have an obligation to share your pleasure with anyone. Your sexuality is valuable simply because it exists, and any belief that attempts to convince you that you have a contract that says you owe it to someone else is wrong.
Your sexual-creative-spiritual energy (they’re all connected) originates inside of you and is a fire that either dies down to an ember or is fanned into flame depending on your relationship to it. Shame is a dampener; when you’re mired in shame about your body and your sexuality, desire dies down.
But there are ways to rekindle the fire. There is a roadmap to free yourself from shame’s shackles so that you con retrieve the pleasure that is rightfully yours. This is what I offer in my course, Sacred Sexuality: A 40-day course for women to heal body shame and ignite desire. The next live round will start on January 13, 2024, and I very much look forward to connecting with you there. The course includes a highly moderated forum and three live coaching calls, which will be held on the following dates. If you can’t make sure live calls, you will receive a recording afterward:
Call 1: Tuesday January 16th at 4pm ET
Call 2: Thursday Feb 1 at 1:30pm ET
Call 3: Tuesday Feb 13th at 3:30pm ET
** Note: This course is for anyone who identifies as female, whether single or in a relationship. **
To listen to last year’s Gathering Gold episode on Sexual Sovereignty, click here.
