Blog
Is it Possible that the World is Only Asking this One Thing of You?
At the intersection of global pain, midlife, children not so little anymore, work and marriage and friendship in more flow than blockage (for which I'm endlessly grateful), I find myself drawn more to slowness, to spaciousness, to real life and local connections, to...
When the World Weeps, I Carry the Tears in the Cups of my Hands
When the world‘s heart shatters again and again and again, I find myself carrying the tears in the cups of my hands, palms upturned like a lotus flower floating on a lake. It’s a serene image, much too serene for the horrors that continue to befall our world, that...
There’s No Such Thing as a Perfect Mother… and Why That’s Important to Know
There's no such thing as a perfect parent. We enter parenthood with wounds and imperfections that will invariably influence our children in some way, The role of parent is not to parent perfectly but to have enough self-awareness and humility to recognize our...
This is What I Can Tell You About the Mother Wound
This is what I can tell you about the mother wound. I can tell you about mother-longing. I can tell you that we never stop longing for a mother to... ... feed us. ... take care of us. ... nurture us in just the right way: not too much and not too little. I can tell...
I Offer This to You In Anticipation of Mother’s Day
“Your children are not your children They are the sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself They come through you but not from you And though they are with you yet they belong not to you…” — from “On Children” by Khalil Gibran Like all manufactured holidays,...
Healing the Mother Wound
As I've sat in the seat of guide and mentor over the last twenty-five years, I've been privileged to be invited into the deepest recesses of psyche where archetypal material - the pain, wounds, joys, thoughts, compulsions, and anxiety common to all humans - rises to...
Anxiety Sneakily Grabbed Me Last Week, and This is How I Responded
The winds are blowing... again. It's dry and hot... too hot and dry for April. We need rain. We needed moisture desperately in December before the fires blew through South Boulder. My heart aches every day for my friends who lost their homes. There was a fire up the...
I’m Excited to Share this News With You, Dear Readers!
One of the greatest joy of doing the work I do is coming into contact with the most beautiful, compassionate, wise, kind, honest people on the planet. A few days ago I had a meeting with some lovely women who I'm considering bringing onto my team and as I was...
Are You Seeking a Magic Potion to Free You From Relationship Anxiety?
Are you looking for the magic pill to free you from relationship anxiety? Are you hoping that you'll read an Instagram post or see a Tik-Tok video and the pieces of confusion about your relationship will instantly fall into place and in one fantastic movie moment your...
How Spring Can Help Heal One Aspect of Relationship Anxiety
For those of you who struggle with the relationship anxiety spike, "I'm not in love enough with my partner", I have a cure for you: Spring! Okay, maybe it's not the type of "cure" that our black-and-white minds would like to believe exists - that magic panacea that...
This is One of the Essential Pieces to Heal from Relationship Anxiety
For those of you in the throes of relationship anxiety, let me first start by saying that you’re not alone and I know how painful and scary it is. I also know that it is entirely possible to break free from relationship anxiety. I have done so myself and I have guided...
There is Gold Inside Your Long Black Shadow Bag and This is How to Find It
Does the word "shadow" scare you a little? If so, you're not alone! Most people feel nervous around shadow conversations, fearing that if they peer inside their "shadow bag" - the term that Robert Bly used to describe the psychological "place" where we stuff the...
Intrusive Pain
I talk a lot about intrusive thoughts on this site, particularly how they pertain to relationship anxiety. I see thoughts as the flares from the Self brilliantly designed to attract our attention so that we can learn to turn inward and attend, possibly for the first...
Unlocking this One Root of Perfectionism Could Set You Free
How would you life be different if you weren't caught in the stronghold of your perfectionist and fear of failure? What would unfold if you weren't addicted to other people's opinions and approval, and buffeted around by their stories like a leaf in the wind? What...
When World Anxiety is at a Heartbreaking High, This is What I Do
I will send out my regularly planned post on Sunday, but when the world is wailing and an innocent country is being set on fire, I need to write. So here I am on Friday night, thinking about you all, grateful for this space where I can try to shape some of my aching...